Reacting to anger is a choice…

Startling but true. That is often how the truth appears. It startles us. The dolphin is captive in a pool. We believe that dolphins are amongst the smartest animals. Imagine if I captured you. Even if I put you in a nice house. Would you be my friend? Would you be content with a life without freedom? Chances are the dolphin is not happy either…so sorry kids, startling but true. Do not mistake that curved up cartilage at the end of the jawbone for a smile.

Most likely we could expect you (and our friend the dolphin for that matter) would be angry. And that is a normal and even predictable emotion to experience. But when we experience it how do we express it and better yet how do we deal with it? Our emotions are just that – ours.

There are generally three ways we deal with emotion, express, suppress or soothe. Of these both express or soothe can be healthy wherein suppressing is generally not but may be beneficial for a time (for example we suppress anger towards our boss when he is yelling at us in order to keep our job – beneficial to avoid dire consequences).

Healthy expression of our anger is the best choice. Anger is natural. When we experience it alerting others that we have it and asking for what we want is the best, albeit not always the easiest, choice. Why is this often not easy for us? Are you ready. It is another startling revelation. We often do not know what we want and therefore we cannot express it. Knowing what we want is often a big challenge. I at times walk around in my life randomly asking myself (out loud even) what do you want? More often than not I discover that I am not really sure and often rather ambivalent about the whole matter. How on earth (irony intended) is the universe supposed to provide for me when I am not even sure what I want…smile.

So again we find ourselves returning to visit our old friend “choice”. If the meaning of everything requires context in order for us to understand it then the creation of happiness within our lives requires us to make conscious choice, even when we are angry. And so my advice, were I disposed to give it, would be to myself (follow it yourself if it amuses you to do so) to allow myself to vent and then think upon my feelings until a clear answer comes to my question; “what do I want?”. Once I know what I want I can then ask for it. And regardless of whether another gives it to me or I manifest through the universal energy it shall surely come. For one truth that I know is that the Universe has no doubt, the universe does not pause, the universe is not ambivalent and so always if I am clear and conscious I will in turn create the life I love to live.

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Bradley

My vision is a world where conflict is communicated and used to stimulate personal freedom and expression for all mankind. My mandate is to reduce conflict using love as my primary tool. My life's work is to learn and then share my learning with others. I am supported by a wonderful loving husband named Pedro, a loving family and many friends. I derive income from helping my clients build and protect their wealth as a financial planner and occasionally from spiritual fitness coaching and speaking engagements. 

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