Choose your words wisely…

Just say yesSometimes when I hear other people talk I wonder if they are listening to their own words. I do not always “choose my words carefully” but as much as possible I listen to my words, my tone, my inference.

There are two sides to each communication, the sender and the receiver. How much we benefit when we actually listen to the words we send out into the universe. How revealing of some of our fears and hopes. It is always important to listen to ourselves.

Recently I was having a conversation and the individual said to me a number of times “children” referring to adults over the age of 25. I thought to myself; “I wonder how long this person has been struggling with their age?”. It struck me as disrespectful and not a way I would speak of others.

Clearly we are adults at some juncture in life. Is it determined by any particular age? Perhaps not. I personally would use the term “young adults” to describe people chronologically as young as 18 or 19. By the age of 25 all people are adults to me regardless of behaviour. Legally in my society you are adult by the age of 19. If you are 14 and have a child are you yourself still a child? I would not say so, nor would I be comfortable referring to the mother as a “child”  but then again that is only my value system which is also based in part on the reality of other cultures outside my own. My husbands mother was only 14 when she had her first child and was married.

But the issue is not really the word or the use of it (that is really semantics). The real issue to me is the intent behind our use of words. If a person uses the word “child” to describe a young girl who was raped and now has a child of her own and the intention is to help secure supports and counseling it is quite different than someone who is trying to put down another by using the term “children” to describe them.

Our intent is what drives the energetic signature we put out to the world. And this signature is what attracts “like to like”. If we chose distance (as in the case of the term “children” for 30 year olds) then chances are we will find that we are surrounded by others who remain distant with us as well. Another way of remaining distant for example, is to gossip. When we gossip we demonstrate to everyone we tell that it is not safe to be around us or trust us because we talk about others. This inevitably begs the question do we talk about them the moment they are gone? The answer is inevitably and unfortunately that we will, because gossip is often a habit. As my mother said to me as a child: “if you cannot think of anything kind to say then say nothing at all”. As an adult I have changed it somewhat to the thought: “look for something kind to say and then say it”.

So the next time you speak, allow yourself to listen carefully to your words. Allow yourself to uncover and discover what is true for you. For only when we tell the truth to ourselves about ourselves can we begin a deeper journey of self-discovery leading to a deeper sense of inner joy.

Today, I choose to speak with integrity and honesty knowing that I am whole, complete and perfect as I am and so is everyone else. I respect myself and therefore it is easy to respect all others. And so it is.



My vision is a world where conflict is communicated and used to stimulate personal freedom and expression for all mankind. My mandate is to reduce conflict using love as my primary tool. My life's work is to learn and then share my learning with others. I am supported by a wonderful loving husband named Pedro, a loving family and many friends. I derive income from helping my clients build and protect their wealth as a financial planner and occasionally from spiritual fitness coaching and speaking engagements. 


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